1 Corinthians 7:7-11, Managing our pain

Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me—a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others.

I do, though, tell the unmarried and widows that singleness might well be the best thing for them, as it has been for me. But if they can’t manage their desires and emotions, they should by all means go ahead and get married. The difficulties of marriage are preferable by far to a sexually tortured life as a single.

And if you are married, stay married. This is the Master’s command, not mine. If a wife should leave her husband, she must either remain single or else come back and make things right with him. And a husband has no right to get rid of his wife.

Instead of behaving we look for change…as though that’s the answer. We get rid of our spouses and find another. We walk away from our churches in search of one more to our liking. We switch jobs. Not only is it silly…it’s pointless. Changing our situation will not make our lives more manageable. Only changing our hearts and minds can do that.

While Paul says he wishes we all could live a simpler life he recognizes even a simple life has its demands…that all of us are not prepared to meet. Like celibacy vs. Marriage. Again, this isn’t only about sex. Sex is a metaphor for the powerful temptation to disobey God..

But, of course, it “is” about sex…because that’s the context in the Corinthian church. My point is, if we recognize the specific teaching here but fail to see its application in other areas of our lives we merely become celibate sinners. On the other hand, if we only focus on the general teaching we never actually apply it to our lives and we become Pharisees.

Paul doesn’t prohibit change. He only reminds us change should not be our default response when we face turmoil or trouble. Our circumstances, specifically our marriages, are not the problem God created them adequate for our need. Unfortunately, few of us are willing to stand up and admit we’re the problem.

Remember Adam? “But Lord, the woman you gave me…”

Which is why Paul says, about marriage, this isn’t his idea…this is God’s idea. So, the reservoir of our marriage is bouncing around wildly and lots of things are spilling over. It’s messy and embarrassing. We’d like to move on. Well, don’t. God says we have no right to.

Live boldly out there today…