February 11, 2014

1 Corinthians 7:1-6, Watch out for spills

Now, getting down to the questions you asked in your letter to me. First, is it a good thing to have sexual relations?

 Certainly—but only within a certain context. It’s good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to “stand up for your rights.” Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it’s for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it. I’m not, understand, commanding these periods of abstinence—only providing my best counsel if you should choose them.
Isn’t this curious: “Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them”

Sexual passion may be the strongest impulse we face. In documented cases it is even stronger than the desire to breathe…and live. It’s part of the reason we find every conceivable reason to excuse bad behavior. Except, Paul says marriage is strong enough to tame this passion…
I know what you want to say: “but, Paul wasn’t married to my spouse!” Let’s just be honest.

Imagine our marriages are vast reservoirs (containers) for life events…one category being sex. Paul says God has created our marriage reservoirs big enough to contain every event without any spilling over. When our sexual desires are in danger of spilling over, or actually spill over, it’s not because the reservoir was too small. It’s because we are no longer “eating to live”, but we are living to eat”. My brother in law once opined, “I wish I could get that monkey off my back”.
I understand…

This is why marriage partners need to be thoughtful and generous with each other (and, not only with sex). The reservoir may be big enough but it’s not always stable enough. If our marriage doesn’t have some equilibrium about it the bumping and bouncing will surely result in spills. None of us…as Christians…want this to happen. So, I need to be more careful and listen carefully to my partner’s needs, whatever they are. If I don’t, she might satisfy them elsewhere.
It makes me an “accessory”…a person who assists in the commission of a sin, but who does not actually participate in the commission of the sin. An accessory is directly responsible for the sin, and can be charged as a joint principal. I’ll bet this is one place where God might agree with our temporal court.

I don’t want that…and neither does she.
Live boldly out there today…

No comments:

Post a Comment