“God said, “Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground.” So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground… The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’…For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” Genesis1:26-28; 2:18, 24
Andrew Greeley, in one of his novels, said “husbands and wives are sacraments to one another. They are the closest we will come to experiencing the real presence of God in this life”. If what he suggests is true...it should give us some sense of the awesome potential of a Christian marriage...the possibility of actually “seeing and experiencing God”...in our spouse. Yet, most married couples miss God’s best simply because they don’t know what God desires for marriage. If we don’t know the purpose of something, it is virtually impossible to realize it’s potential. Therefore, over 50% of marriages end in divorce, and a large number of those who remain married continue to miss God’s purpose for their union. Today, I hope to move your new marriage in the direction God desires by examining his Word and considering the qualities that God desires for marriage.
God’s Desire for Marriage Is that it Reflects His Image. We are told in the first two chapters of Genesis (1:26-28, 2:18, 24) “God said,
Let us make man in our image, in our likeness
Let them rule over...all the earth
So God created man in his own image,
Male and female he created them.
Be fruitful and increase in number
It is not good for the man to be alone.
I will make a helper suitable for him
For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,
They will become one flesh. The Bible teaches Adam and Eve, as husband and wife, were created in the image of God and, therefore, were meant to bear God’s image—to be in his likeness. Marriage was meant to model and display God’s glory to all of creation. We see his image in the plurality and unity of marriage. God said, “Let us make man in our image,” and then the text says, “male and female, he created them” (v. 26, 27). When God made man, he made a plurality. He made man and woman, and later in the narrative, he said they would become “one flesh” (Gen 2:24).
So, first...A marriage that reflects the image of God is Indivisible: For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh. One flesh cannot be divided. The image of God in the Trinity reflects this. God is three people; God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit; they are one and yet still individual persons. When a couple gets married, they are meant to demonstrate this. Christian marriage is two individual people...joined by God the Holy Spirit...becoming “one” for the rest of their lives while maintaining their individuality. One flesh cannot be divided or separated. Yet, we live in a world where half of our marriages crumble. This defies God’s desire that our marriage reflects His image.
This is a very high standard. So high, in fact, that scripture informs us “anyone who divorces his spouse, except for sexual immorality, and marries another person commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9). The only way we can hope to achieve such a challenging expectation for a lasting marriage is when it perfectly reflects God’s image as one indivisible being. This means we must continue to practice qualities that support unity.
How?
Love...”agape” love...a very special and unique love.
“Agape” is the word scripture reserves to describe God’s love for us. In order for us to emulate such illusive aspirations we begin by acknowledging we must love each other like God loves us; we must put the focus on the other...for the redemptive intention of bringing out the best in the other. “Agape” is never about ourselves. It’s always about the other. Consider further Ephesians 5:25-27: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless”. But demonstrating these qualities is almost humanly impossible unless we engage that third person in our marriage...the Holy Spirit.
Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 13 exactly what it looks like when we love one another as Christ loves us; “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres
I can’t imagine a relationship what won’t last if these qualities are present. Devotion to one another will never be difficult when we reflect the perfect sacrificial love of Christ for the church. Also...when the world looks at your Christian marriage...they should see a husband who makes daily sacrifices for his wife and actively leads the home spiritually. He leads his family to church. He leads family devotions. He serves his wife and edifies her with his words. He sacrifices to please her and build her up. The wife honors him for this. This is a redemptive picture of the gospel. People will be encouraged and challenged by watching your godly marriage. They will see something of the glory and the greatness of God.
The rewards are palpable. God has put an innate desire in mankind for intimate companionship and marriage satisfies this longing The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’ Genesis 2:18. This is why so many single people, though they have family and friends, covet something more and often have bouts of loneliness. God made us to be married. A man to a woman and woman to a man. Someone to fellowship with, to dream with, to serve with, and to be heirs of life together with. It is a beautiful experience and a great gift. Solomon gave several reasons that companionship is good. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 says: Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Live boldly out there today...
